I'm Kind of a Big Deal

I had to stay in the hospital last night for a sleep study (I have to do this every year). I have sleep apnea, and I sleep with a cpap machine everynight. It is the vain of my existence, but , thankfully, I am blessed to have a life full of friends who support my condition by calling me "Darth Vader" on a regular basis.

But I am getting ahead of myself. Last week, a friend asked me if I would like to appear on an SBS (Seoul Broadcasting System) news program. I looooove being in the spotlight (shocking, I know), so of course I said "YES!" I even made 50,000 won for my amazing thespian ability.

It was a very easy shoot. My friend, Anna Rose, and I had to sit in a restaurant, eat dok boki, and act like it was very spicy and delicious. They encouraged us to "over"act, which is the ONLY acting I know! So no problem there!

Koreans are very proud of their spicy food, which, I admit, is very delicious, but they expect it to be too spicy for foreigners. And they expect us to be shocked and unable to eat it. It has been difficult to convey the fact that there are many spicy foods in America, especially Louisiana. But I usually just go with it and say "Wow. Yes, this is very spicy."

Now, let's go back to the hospital. When I saw my doctor and nurses this morning, they greeted me with "We saw you on TV!!!!" Then they started impersonating me by waving their hands in front of their mouths and saying "Dok boki! Spicy!" It was hilarious!

I did not even know the segment had aired, but it is official. I am famous in Korea! I had only met my doctor and his staff one other time, so I must have made quite an impression for them to recognize me. But I guess I do stand out in a crowd here!

The doctor referred me to a plastic surgeon to correct my sleep apnea, and I am currently in the plastic surgeon's office blogging. If that doesn't equal celebrity, I don't know what does....one moment please....

Sorry, I had to sign an autograph....

Anyway, I have not seen the news segment, but as soon as I get my hands on a copy I will post it on here, provided I don't look like a complete idiot or fat. The camera adds ten pounds, you know. At least, that is what I tell myself.

Until next time, spend your money where it counts, on shoes!
(that is my new sign off phrase)

This has been Laura Swilley, SBS foreign correspondent on the street.

Good to the Last Drop

Yesterday morning, I was in a mad dash to work, as usual. I was in dire need of caffeine, so I ran in "the hut," of which I do not know the real name. We, and by "we" I mean foreigners, have created its name over the years. It is just a small convenience store about the size of a cubby hole. I wanted to get my daily shot of espresso. I prefer Starbucks Americano Doubleshot Espresso, but I was just searching for anything with the word "espresso" written on the can, cup, bottle, etc. I finally found a Korean brand of coffee with espresso written in English. I bought two cups and went merrily on my way. I was ten steps outside of the hut when I took my first sip. Slimy chunks of espresso slid up my straw and into my mouth. I immediately thought "This espresso has gone bad!" and spit it out on the sidewalk (or pavement for my English/Irish friends). I thought I was going to retch, literally. I looked at the expiration date printed on the cup, which was several weeks away, then meticulously examined the rest of the cup.

The small white print in English reads "Exclusive coffee of original latte with jelly espresso." Coffee with chunks of gelled espresso??? What mentally deranged person thought this was a good idea??? And who did this company use as a taste tester? Andrew Zimmern???

As the SBS foreign correspondent on the street, I do NOT approve.